TIPS ON HOW TO SAY "NO" TO WORK AND MEAN IT WITHOUT LOSING YOUR EARNING POWER........
Posted by Vishva News Reporter on March 1, 2008

 

 

SAYING NO AT WORK
IS THE FIRST STEP
TO HAVING WORK-LIFE BALANCE
TO ENJOY LIFE FROM
THE FRUITS OF WORK

Work-life balance is the latest initiative in many industrialized nations on this planet earth TO HAVE A TRULY HAPPIER DAY TOMORROW THAN TODAY giving adequate and equitable importance to WORK and LIFE. Following is some extracts from the work-life balance web site of Canadian Government: (you can visit the site for a lot of knowledge by clicking on the yellow hilite)

  • By reducing work-life struggles, individuals can enjoy a healthier lifestyle while improving productivity at work.
  • People have family and personal responsibilities and needs outside of work, whether it is the caring of children and/or elderly parents, or the pursuit of personal interests, activities or hobbies. Finding ways to accommodate these responsibilities and needs can make a real difference to employees and to an organization.
  • Work-Life balance is about creating supportive, healthy work environments for employees who are striving to better integrate their work and personal responsibilities.
  • By implementing proactive programs and initiatives that support employees, organizations can strengthen employee commitment and loyalty, resulting in higher productivity, improved customer satisfaction and healthier bottom lines.

The first step in achieving a work-life balance should start with the source of the problem, that is, YOU YOURSELF. It is YOUR decision of what is valuable to your life that determines the priorities in life at various stages in YOUR life. But this decision can only be fruitful to YOU if  YOU understand some of the basics of life such as:

  • Earning to provide for all needs of life is important for a happy life;
  • However, earnings beyond a certain point will not be useful in either getting happiness or increasing happiness;
  • This is because wealth from earnings cannot buy most of the happiness that comes from being with each other to enjoy each other, helping each other to grow, being there for YOUR loved one when and where it is needed,  creating and maintaining relationship beyond work hours that YOU will need as you grow old and work becomes secondary or not necessary.....
  • And million other reasons that you will find if you take time out from work to seriously and honestly look at what you are doing in life that makes you miss the happy times of life....

To learn how to start saying NO to YOURSELF and YOUR employment to work that is unnecessary ruining YOUR life of a happy time please click on the line outside this box........ Champak Mistry

(This column was contributed by  of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada from his continuing study at PVAF about HOW TO MAKE YOUR TOMORROW HAPPIER THAN TODAY.....)
 

 

 



 

What part of no don't you understand?
For the sake of your career health,
it can sometimes pay
to stop being a yes person.

From: Canadian Globe & Mail: March 29, 2006: WALLACE IMMEN

Whenever it was time for more work to be handed out in her job as an advertising copywriter for agency Ogilvy & Mather, Susan Newman became known as the "go to" person.

Anxious to keep bosses happy and be seen as a valuable team member, she always responded with a "no problem," no matter how busy a week she was having.

But far from winning praise for taking on the extra burdens, she found she was criticized for falling behind in her projects, and she was losing her creative edge.

"I would agree to everyone's requests and I was in a constant state of overload and anxiety," she recalls. "Then I'd get upset with myself and mad at others."

As Ms. Newman discovered, it doesn't always pay to be a yes person. While being eager to take on challenging assignments and assist team members when they need help are supposed to be qualities that help you get ahead, in reality, for the health of your career, she says, you have to just say no.

"That may sound selfish, but I really believe if you want to get ahead and keep from being overwhelmed, you have to be clear that your priorities come first," said Ms. Newman, the author of a new book, The Book of No: 250 Ways to Say It -- and Mean It and Stop People-Pleasing Forever. "Saying no can pay benefits for your career."

But that can be tough, because people are programmed all their lives to say yes, says Ms. Newman, who, after leaving her advertising job to get a PhD now teaches social sciences and writing at Rutgers University in New Brunswick, N.J.

"It starts when our parents say 'if you say no, you are going to your room.' That's reinforced in school, where teachers expect agreement. By the time we launch a career, we're conditioned to feel guilty about saying no," she explains.

And that's destined to hold you back. "The most common source of overload in a job is the willingness to take on more and more and more, trying to look good. Instead, you wind up staggering from the weight and looking not so good."

So how do you say no to work and still keep on the good side of the boss and be seen as a team player?

It's a matter of unlearning the programming and making deliberate decisions about when people are taking advantage of your good nature, she says.

Moreover, the strategy for saying no depends on who you are saying it to.

Co-workers can easily get into the habit of coming to the " yes person" first whenever they need help for anything, from taking a report home to revise on the weekend to helping replace the toner in the copy machine, Ms. Newman says.

"The fear of saying no comes from imagining the person is going to be upset with you and think you are not a team player and that you have no concern for the job," she says.

But, in reality, if you say no, the person asking for help will likely go elsewhere.

"Actually what the person is thinking is: Okay, you said 'no,' so I'm going to ask someone else. People just want the job done, so don't waste your time and energy worrying about how saying no will be perceived," she says.

The way to deprogram others' expectations: Become very deliberate about thinking through a request before making a commitment, she recommends. "Just say, I'll give you an answer later."

You may still decide to eventually take on a task, but the deliberation will deflect expectations that you are the default "go to" person, she says.

When an immediate superior or team leader is the one piling on an assignment, Ms. Newman suggests making it clear how much of a contribution you are already making.

"Remember, the star performers are the ones most likely to be asked to take on tasks, so take it as a compliment," she says. "But also remember you are a star because you do superior work and you are going to do less well if you are overloaded."

She says to point out how taking on more could affect the quality or time it takes to complete. Make clear you understand the importance of the project but that other priorities will have to be revised, or suggest others in the team who could do the task.

 

 


With a boss, "you should avoid using the actual word no, Ms. Newman recommends. If the boss says, "This is a rush job and I know you can do it," but you are already overloaded, come back with a description of the projects you have on the go, and say "Let's review them and reorder the priorities, because I'm working flat out now."

That makes the points that you are working hard, are conscientious and willing to take on more, but are also concerned that it might take away from the quality you are putting into the work already assigned.

That leaves it up to the boss, who may decide to take the assignment to someone else. At the very least, it can ease your immediate workload so you don't feel so overwhelmed.

Even executives and managers can gain benefits from being more willing to say no, Ms. Newman says.

If you're getting pressure from management to speed up a project or bring it in under budget, you can end up failing despite your efforts, and hurt staff morale in the process.

Instead, Ms. Newman suggests sitting down with the boss and saying something like: "I'm pushing my employees to peak performance and this new request risks pushing them over the edge."

Without having to directly say no, you have laid out consequences that could affect success unless the project, deadline or staffing is changed.

That makes it clear that you are concerned with the outcomes and want to lead in a way that is best for the company and your employees.

In any case, you should always stress how willing you are to do the best for everyone concerned, Ms. Newman advises.

And, you don't want to slam the door completely on managers and colleagues you must work with and who you have to count on for help, she notes. Offer to take on your share of the load when it is convenient; when it is not, stay supportive by saying for instance, "No, I can't help you out now, but when I get this project done and I have time, I'll be happy to help you later."

"Saying no isn't about shirking responsibility. It's about being willing and able when it is justified, but backing away when it is clear it has no advantage or that people are taking advantage of your good nature, Ms. Newman says.

"Unless you learn how to say no to taking on everyone else's job, you're not going to get your own work done."


Wallace Immen


TIPS ON HOW TO
JUST SAY NO

Here are tips for saying no and meaning it from Susan Newman, author of The Book of No.

  • Examine your exuberance. Make a list of every time you've said yes to a request over the past few weeks. Ask yourself why you agreed and whether it was really what you wanted to do.

  • Keep your priorities straight. Help out when it's convenient, but remember that doing your own work well is most important.

  • Establish and guard personal boundaries. Let it be known when an outside responsibility for spouse, children or parents makes you unavailable.

  • Know your physical limits. How much can you take on? If you find you aren't doing your best work or it's spilling into weekends or causing you to lose sleep, turn down additional responsibilities until you catch up.

  • Even if you can, should you? Estimate the probability of success, because doing poorly or taking on tasks beyond your ability or expertise could end up working against you.

  • Think before you decide. Ask for time to consider and details of what's expected before making a decision.

  • Say no without being negative. Make clear that, in saying no, you are already heavily involved in work at hand and doing it for the good of the company and the team.

  • Don't get into a debate. Going into a long explanation of your reasons can end up turning into a discussion designed to persuade you to change your mind.

  • Negotiate a compromise. If your job or a promotion is in the balance, you may have to agree, but make it clear that, if you are overwhelmed, you have to put off some other priority.

  • Get a quid pro quo. If the person says "I owe you one," take them up on it.

  • No should mean no. Once you've made a final decision, stick with it.
     



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