Posted by Vishva News Reporter on December 27, 2002


"A Few Good Dentists" (K. Banerjee)
(smirk, original, swearing)

A scene from "A Few Good Dentists," starring Tom Cruise and Jack Nicholson: (adapted from the movies "A Few Good Men"
Tom Cruise: "Did you order the flossing?" 

Jack Nicholson: "You want answers?" 

Tom Cruise: "I think I'm entitled." 

Jack Nicholson: "You want answers?!!" 

Tom Cruise: "I want the tooth!" 

Jack Nicholson: 

"You can't handle the tooth! Son, we live in a world that has oral diseases. And those oral diseases have to be cured by men with sharp, painful instruments. Who's gonna do it? You? 

I have a greater responsibility than you can possibly fathom. You weep for Gleem and you curse the ADA. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know: that Gleem's death, while tragic, probably saved teeth. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves teeth. You don't want the tooth. Because deep down, in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that molar. You need me on that molar! 

We use words like regular checkups, plaque, tartar ... We use these words as the backbone to a life spent cleaning mouths. You use 'em as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the very blanket of the oral hygiene I provide, then questions the manner in which I provide it. I'd prefer you just said thank you and went on your way. Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a brush and scrub a tooth. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you're entitled to!" 

Tom Cruise: "Did you order the flossing?" 

Jack Nicholson: I did my job. I'd do it again.

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